June 19, 2012

• have you ever survey

  Given a Hickey? I refuse to suck the poison out of spider and snake bites.

  Had a one night stand? Following someone around who is wearing a headlamp is maddening when they have to keep turning in the dark to look at you while they are talking.

  Made someone cry? There is no end to the guilt after you've accidentally stepped on a chicken.

  Opened your Christmas presents early? I prefer getting it all over with as soon as possible. Like in November. Hey, this year the world ends before Christmas, I better open my presents early.

  Been online for more than 10 hours in a row? I think the better question is what is the longest it's taken to load a youtube. Back in the day on my slower pc and slower connection, yes, it actually took 10 hours one time.

  Pretended to be someone you weren't online? No, and I've never cheated in Monopoly, either. I am everyone I name myself.

  Eaten food that fell on the floor? Whatever happened to leaving food out for brownies and leprechauns? I think you're supposed to leave it down there.

  Been caught cheating? I'd like to say it's embarrassing to get caught cheating on a test, but when the teacher thought I was the one cheating because I was getting the same answers as both the guy behind me and the guy beside me, dayam, grow a brain. I was doing experiments to see how far into the semester they'd go before they figured out I was flunking their tests for them.

  Been caught naked? You wouldn't think it would be a problem after being married so long, but yeah, I really hate being caught in vulnerable positions by surprise.

  Flashed someone? Try as hard as I might not to, someone just keeps walking in on me.
  

  Gone out without underwear on? Surprisingly, this happens when someone yells like crazy while you're in the shower and you have to run outside really really fast. And later you go *oh* after you realize everyone has all the crevices and shapes in your damp loungers burned into their brains. Thankfully, this has never happened to me. I won't mention names.

  Got into a fist fight? I have a killer fist, and I'm not experienced in pulling punches. Oopsie. And it wasn't even a fight. My bad.

  Swallowed bath water? I know someone who used to love soapy bath water when she was about 4. Now she wouldn't touch the same glass someone else has previously touched.

  Peed in the pool? Epic fail. I don't see how other people can make so free.

  Thrown up in public? I got really tired of that by the time I hit my 20's. I'm an ex-puker. I still get really carsick sometimes though.

  Been so drunk you can't walk? I have a good story for this.
  

  Peed in public? I have an *awesome* story for this. And it wasn't me. And a cop was involved.

  Broken wind and blamed someone else? You know how you think you're finally alone in an aisle at a store and you can cut loose, but before you can get away someone turns into your aisle and right into your fog and ~knows~ you did it? Yeah, bad week. You know what? I finally figured out I was allergic to something I was eating, and that never happens any more. Too bad people died before I figured that out.

  Done something mean you regretted? I have yet to regret anything mean I've ever done. Well, except maybe the time I put a bar of soap in my little brother's fish tank. The fish really didn't deserve that.

  Ever played pull my finger? Don't trust ANY uncle who says to do that, even if they are the good uncle.
  

  • 9:38 pm
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