• no idea what to call this stray survey

    What was the last thing you drank?
    Hot chocolate. I so love hot chocolate.

    Where's your cell phone?
    I just want to say right now that I NEVER get weird calls on my cell because I'm unlisted and I'm on a no call list, but an 800# that reverses back to "Will Kemp" from New York came through earlier, and I'm like ok, Will Kemp wants to talk to me... No, I'm not calling it back. Someone prolly wants to sell me something. If he wanted to talk to me bad enough he'd have left voice mail.

    Who was the last person you talked to on the phone for more than an hour?
    That used to happen every time my dad called, but lately he seems to have himself on an egg timer, and I'm wondering what's going on. You never realize how much you'll miss those calls full of instructions on what to do when he dies, like making sure to yank his gold teeth out with a pliers before the funeral home gets them and so no one will dig up his grave to get them, and I'm all like Dad, I am NOT straddling your dead body with tools and tearing up your face to get the gold, I'll go to jail for murder and senior abuse, and he's all like It's ok, you have the right to do it because I told you to, and I'm all like Dad, I do NOT want the nightmares that'll give me the rest of my life... We have some really fun conversations, they stress me out. I wonder if someone told him I'm stressing out and now he isn't talking to me. My stress is getting very complicated.

    Do you know anything about baseball?
    I watch Scott run his fantasy baseball teams over his shoulder. I tell him his players are dogs and laugh at what his coworker writes about him and ask him over and over how much money he's going to lose if he doesn't get his rank up. Watching him sweat is a sport unto itself, cracks me up.

    Do you prefer to listen to music through headphones or on a stereo?
    Headphones, and I'll tell you why. In fact, I've got really expensive headphones that super block outer noise. The last thing I wanna hear when I'm trying to listen to a youtube or some music is people screaming on whatever show Scott is watching, because it's usually bloody and terrible and ridiculous. We get along great because I have these awesome headphones.

    Do you use those little kitchen clips to close bags of chips that you've opened?
    We don't eat chips. Solves a lot more problems than you think.

    If you made your own survey, would it piss you off you saw people giving smart ass answers as if you were asking stupid questions?
    Bingo, this survey maker has *issues*. Getting a few good questions, and bam, attitude.

    Does the story of the Titanic interest you?
    And now I can't help saying that the person who answered these questions before me is one of the single most boring survey takers I've seen in 8 years. ~wow~ I've never seen IQs go in reverse before. I've seen them stall out and stultify, but this one can't be human. Is it possible to epic fail a survey?

    What channel do you watch most often?

    I haven't been watching tv much lately. I went on this book bender and slammed my brain through 6 of them back to back, most of which were 400+ pages, and tv kinda seems lame right now.

    Have you ever voluntarily read the Bible?
    I can't tell you how fun it is to know it better than the door knockers who come to my house.

    Do you use a lot of slang or do you prefer to speak properly?
    "I don't really know." See, this is what I'm talking about. This person is filling out the survey like they're from another planet and aren't quite sure what is being asked of them.

    What's your favorite salad dressing besides ranch?
    I make my own from scratch. It's nearly impossible to find a bottled dressing ~anywhere~ that isn't spiked with lemon or "natural flavor", even when you get balsamic.

    Why is it that pizza always tastes so much better left over?
    It doesn't. If you are hungry enough to eat leftover pizza and too lazy to make something better or there just isn't anything else to eat, then yeah, it tastes really good. If you really think about old pizza, it's just stale sweet bread with a few sorta strong flavors on it, which is sometimes more attractive than going to all the trouble of pancakes and eggs, especially if your blood sugar is bottomed out. Left over pizza is an illusion.

    Do you like to wear high heels?
    I will never, ever forget the first time I saw a girl walking in wedges, way back when they were first invented. She had a hard time walking on chat and getting on the bus, and everyone jeered because they looked so weird. But her family had money and she was on the leading edge of fashion, and the next year all the girls were wearing wedges. Except me. I love my ankles. Ten Reasons to Stash Those Stilettos

    Why do you think most teenagers don't enjoy reading?
    Um... really? Blanket statement alert. I think the activity of reading has so drastically changed that it's not even the same thing it used to be for a lot of people. Between technology and media driven formula, I'm surprised so many teens aren't doing other things instead of loading the internet up with hundreds of thousands of teen surveys...

    Do you enjoy reading? Why?
    Having to laboriously read labels because of food allergies is a drag, and the redundancy of retweets and reblogs seems like such a waste, but yeah, I do get a kick out of other people putting words out there for me to find. It's kinda like brain sex.

    Is your computer more than 5 years old?
    We are finding out the hard way that upgrading to windows 7 suddenly makes our software obsolete. Now I have to pay twice as much for what I need from Print Shop just to get the same amount of product I was getting 5 years ago because the new computer won't interface with it. Oh, that wiley windows 7, I bet all those companies got so excited at the new excuse to boost the market.

    Do you think that eventually people will run out of unique questions to ask on surveys?
    I will never run out of unique answers, no matter how many times some of these questions are repeated.

    How often do you take over the counter pain medications like Tylenol and Aleve?
    Almost never. Do you know how many otc pain relievers contain ibuprofen? I'm allergic to that. And acetaminophen can mess with your liver. One of the most common ailments that affect people as they get older is liver problems. Tylenol May Cause Serious Liver Damage

    Do you find thongs uncomfortable to wear?
    After washing a teenager's thongs throughout middle and high school, I'm so put off that I can't even think they're cute or sexy any more. I also worked in the intimates dept in a big retail chain for several years. I've played with more panties and thongs than anyone I know, thousands and thousands and thousands of them. I think thongs are a gimmick to make money off the self obsessed.

    What’s the unhealthiest thing you’ve done in the past week?
    I don't know that anything I do or eat could be called unhealthy, honestly. I guess breathing the dust stirred up in the chicken pen. Silly chickens. They were bored, pretending to freak out while they're all excited about snacks is ~*fun*~. Youngsters...

    What’s the furthest you’ve gone sexually? Is this more or less than your friends?
    The funniest thing about this question is that I really do have good answers and it kills some people that I never say what they are. I know several people who have 'gone farther' doing stupid things than I have because they were nidiots wanting drugs or something, but I seem to be mysteriously more acutely aware of certain details than most people.

    Tell us the story of how you met your ex.
    It would be a lot more interesting to tell you the story of how it all blew up into the long dark night of the soul.

    Have you ever blocked anyone on Xanga? If so, why?
    I blocked over 5000 people on facebook just to see if I could. Incidentally, it's impossible to block Mark Zuckerberg, facebook's founder. I tried every which way.

    If you’ve never had an orgasm, why not? Are you curious about what it feels like?
    I've lived with a back injury nearly all my life that sets off occasional spontaneous orgasms at the worst possible very public times, stories for around the campfire, I guess.

    Do you alphabetize anything? (your DVD collection, books etc)
    Yes to anything that is set up to automatically alphabetize itself.

    When writing essays, do you have trouble sticking to the word limit?
    How can I *possibly* hold that down to only 50 pages? What do they want, a ~summary~?!? Yeah, I've had to really work on that.

    Are there certain answers to survey questions that make you feel sorry for the taker? (For example Who was your last kiss? I’ve never been kissed)
    I've never felt sorry for myself just because a question has been asked of me. Ok, I lie. I plunge into dark abysmal depressions and take days on some of these surveys, because I'm HONEST. I soul search. I face the crap that life dishes out. I've said it before, if you fill these things out correctly, it's like seeing a psychologist.

    Do you own any cookery books?
    I've stolen a few...

    Do you understand people who have no desire to travel?
    I don't understand people who are proud to be living on the same little patch of land that the previous 8 generations lived and died on. I'd have thrown myself out a window. And then I'd have gotten up and stomped off, because there probably wasn't a window high enough to properly throw myself out of.

    Would you like to receive flowers from a boyfriend, or would you prefer a different type of gift?
    I think the nicest gift anyone can give me is peace and quiet. Usually doesn't last very long.

    Do music videos affect how much you like a song?
    I can't tell you what this one has done for my life.

    Do you know a lot about business?
    I am really, really good at inventory.

    Tell us about something you’ve been worrying about lately.
    If I wind up being expected to come back and do another life, I think I'd really like a twin next time. That intrigues me. I'm not stirring up near the amount of trubba I could be, I need a cohort. Knowing the irony that haunts my soul, though, I'm sure that would backfire and I'd wind up being my own worst enemy.

    What’s your birthstone and do you actually like it? What’s your favourite birthstone?
    I can't keep track of these things, I'm busy digging through youtubes and doing my laundry.

    Do you believe that short men are often arrogant or angry to try to make up for their height?
    I think men are cool. I wrote that. I mean it.


  • 60 questions people don't ask

    When's the last time you ran? When I realized I'd forgotten about the stuff on the stove. Running doesn't actually help at all from one room to the next when it's already too late, but you feel like you at least tried.

    Do your jeans have rips, tears, and holes in them? Nobody ever thinks of their jeans as being a couple of long holes sewn together into a bigger short hole. The whole garment is a plethora of holes to begin with.

    What are you dreading right now? I'm surprised to find out I am dreading something. How did you know? I mean, *I* didn't even know. I'm racking my brain... nothing... wait... nope, I got nothing. Maybe you can tell me what I'm dreading right now. Survey creators are like Time Lords, you can't outwit them.

    Do you celebrate 420? I had to look that up to find out that is National Weed Day. And my first thought was Who the crap celebrates weeds?! Oh, survey maker, you corrupt me.

    Do you get the full 8 hours of sleep a night? I think I hit that once in the last 15 or so years. Severe sleep disorder, yada yada, I'm lucky to get 4-6 hours on a good night, yada yada, if I'm ~really~ lucky I get two hours at a time, yada yada, been to sleep clinic, they booted me out because I only slept 20 minutes, yada yada... I'm living proof that severe sleep deprivation 1- doesn't kill you like it feels like it will, 2- doesn't destroy your health as much as drinking soda pop does, and 3- doesn't age you any faster in the long run then getting lots of tans. And I know these things because I don't drink soda pop or get tans, and people never guess my age right. I think a more pertinent question would be What is the longest you've gone without sleeping more than 2 hours a night? And to this I reply Six weeks during the worst migraine in my life and I couldn't lay down at all and had to sleep two minutes at a time sitting up holding my head. And nearly 20 years getting the 4-6 hours a night. All you pansies out there can suck it up.

    If anyone came to your house on your "lazy days" what would ya'll do? I'all would feed you'un up. That's what I's born to do.

    Who last grabbed your ass? *HUG* You, survey maker, just won my grand prize of honorable mention for using one of my fave movies in a survey questionnaire.

    Have you ever been on your school's track team? I actually begged to do that in middle school. I was awesome at hurdles because I loved jumping everything I could at home. I was the original hardcore parkour junkie, long long long before it was oh so cool. I jumped out of trees, off the roof of the house, over every fence I could, jumped my bike over ditches and stuff. Wrecked. But oh so cool. Anyway, no I wasn't allowed to join the track team. My dad said it wasn't necessary.

    Do you own a pair of Converse? asics. They're like walking on pillows.

    Did you copy and paste this survey? Totally ripped it off, yes.

    Do you eat raw cookie dough? I challenge anyone to beat me at this. One December some years ago I was making gallons of cookie dough for Christmas and wound up with a colonoscopy after not being able to eat for 3 weeks. Everything turned out fine, but see kids, THIS is why you don't eat cookie dough 3 meals a day. I don't do that any more, but at the time I thought I was in heaven. I can't help wondering if this little stressor is what triggered my peanut allergy.

    Have you ever kicked a vending machine? When you work a hotel desk you see people do all kinds of things to vending machines. Better on the machine than me. I handed out free popcorn with the money I gave back to them. We had this one machine that was so screwed up that stuff would actually get to the point of being impossible to have NOT dropped, and ~still~ insanely just hung there through all kinds of machine abuse, so I got to where I'd start my shift purposely feeding coins in just to get it ready to go, and some lucky person would get a double treat first thing. I noticed no one ever returned the freebie.

    Don't you hate it when the radio ruins good songs by playing them over and over? It's even worse when you never even listen to the radio except once a week in the car going to an appointment, and then the next week you hear the exact same lineup again at the exact same time because you glance at the console clock at the same time and place in the song and road that you did the week before and go through this deja vu crap messing up your head. I have enough trouble keeping my weeks straight as it is, they could at least shuffle them.

    Do you watch Trading Spaces? I can't watch stuff like that, it stresses me out. I'd rather wake up to the zombie apocalypse than swap out my cave.

    How do you eat oreos? Never...? I think the survey maker is losing the temporal connection to my spacetime locality.

    Have you ever stayed online for a very long time waiting for someone? Let's think ahead and ask Have you ever repeated this experience because you didn't learn from the first time?

    Are you cocky? I lack roosters. All hens out there.

    Could you live without a computer? Easily. I rarely log on at all. I'm on braincation.

    Do you wear your shoes in the house? My podiatrist wishes I would. He commanded me to BUY GOOD SHOES to wear in my house, so I bought these and thought Cool, I look like a space cadet. Until I discovered about a month later that everyone in the Heaven's Gate mass suicide was wearing identical shoes... which I first saw on Ancient Aliens: Season 3, Episode 12 "Aliens and Deadly Cults"

    Who or what sleeps with you? I get the occasional spider running across my face, which really ticks me off, especially given the sleep disorder mentioned above. I am a spider magnet, it's creepy. They march out into the open and present themselves to me like I'm the queen, and freeze on spot trembling knowing they'll be killed but unable to move. It really looks like that, too, I have a witness.

    At what age did you find out that Santa wasn't real? First grade, I bawled in my lunch, ruined my whole day.

    How many phones, house phones and cell phones are in your house? I think we still have old ones stashed around here, no idea. I'll have the spare parts people are always needing on tv shows about death and devastation and surviving on your wits and scrounging tech parts.

    What do you do when you're sad? I'm lately dealing with that being a continual underlying theme with my psychologist. And this is one of the best questions I've ever seen on a silly survey, besides the one that left me wondering a couple of years ago whether the survey maker had helped bury a body. I'm thinking this list of questions is how our survey maker is handling being sad right now.

    Who would you call first if you won the lottery? Prolly best to just take off in the night before anyone can block my driveway.

    Last time you saw your best friend? I'm pretty sure it was around 4:50 this morning, but I was so close to sleep walking that I'm unreliable.

    Are you in high school? I'm so glad I'm not. I don't miss that one bit.

    What jewelry are you wearing? I have some headphones slung around my neck.

    Is anyone on your bad side now? Nope, it's all good here. Well, I'm not keen on one of my sons-in-law right now, but bravely resisting the urge to whine about the good one that got shredded and thrown to the crows for something I personally think is trivial, but then, who am I to judge nidiots making what I think are poor decisions after all the stuff I've done in my life, right? Right. I just keep my mouth shut. Mostly. I try really hard, anyway.

    What's the first thing you do when you get online? Put my away message on. "Sorry I missed you, my brain is on hold."

    Do you watch Grey's Anatomy? Not a single episode.

    How do most people spell your name? It's mystifying how uniquely I've seen my name spelled in a variety of ways. I didn't know it was so phonetically capable.

    Would you wear a boy/girlfriends clothes? Scott's got such a tiny butt, it's physically impossible. He really is beautiful in the shower. Dang, you distracted me.

    Where do you work? This room, that room, outside... Always something to stay busy. I'm currently working on several projects and needed a break before my brain explodes.

    What are you doing tomorrow? Ok, my brain exploded.

    Is Justin Timberlake becoming the next Michael Jackson? This is the perfect place to crack a racial slur, like do you think he's white enough, but I'm floored how anyone could think another soul could hold a candle to Michael Jackson. What is he doing, storing bodily fluids in ziplock bags or something? Shooting up anesthetics? Building ferris wheels? Actually, I had a Michael Jackson poster in my bedroom from when he was still black, and I loved the guy, so no, Justin Timberlake, no. I think my survey maker is blowing a fuse or something, prolly all that undealt with sadness.

    Favorite name for a girl? Already gave it to my kiddo.

    Favorite name for a boy? I'm hoping like mad we're not going to have the chance to try that out, I'm kinda having one of those midlife pregnancy scares. But if it happens, I'll fight for something Irish since the other one is Irishly named (the first thing out of *everyone's* mouths is "Not Liam!", and no worries, no, not that). (Ok, everyone so far is two people.)

    Will you keep your last name when you get married? My first last name was so gone a long time ago. Got tired of having to spell it out for everyone. Too bad we don't use a schluss S here, or umlauts.

    When was the last time you left your house? I leave it all the time. I have this curious conflicting life where I adore being reclusive but am either so in demand or having too much anxiety to handle being alone that I feel compelled to leave the house constantly.

    Do you return your cart? Without hesitation. There were a couple of years where I literally couldn't, and I so appreciate being able to do that now.

    Do you have a dishwasher? Just me.

    What noise do you hear? Monster bugs hitting the window. I'm about ready for a couple of frogs to camp out on my deck.

    Would you survive in prison? I would have no problem stabbing people if I had a good excuse *ahem*, I mean, reason to.

    Who is the youngest in your family? Well, it might be the false alarm I'm having...

    If all of your friends were going on a road trip, who would most likey overpack? All of my friends, I am so cracking up. I have one friend. And yes, he over packed on his last trip.

    Do you know anyone with the same name as you? *roll eyes here* There are at least 5 other me's within 50 miles of my house. I find that disturbing. And it's really annoying when someone in a pharmacy thinks they have to alert my doctor that I'm trying to get controlled meds and my doctor interrogates me and I'm oblivious and, like, where the heck is this coming from, and when it all boils down it's another me with a different birthday. Human error affects my life in so many ways on a fairly weekly basis.

    What's the last thing you purchased? I picked up a cheap dvd player to experiment on. I read somewhere how to reprogram players for all regions, so I can buy region 2 stuff off amazon that we don't get here.

    Do your siblings ever pay for stuff for you? I don't sponge off them, if that's what you mean. I'm going to guess that the survey maker, based on previous questions, is still in high school and can't afford stuff and an older sibling buys something for them once in awhile...?

    What brand are your pants right now? Like pants. I wonder if the survey maker is feeling kinda guilty or something.

    Ever been to Georgia (the state)? And lives in Georgia. The state. And having to say it like that indicates this person is aware of the European/Russian Georgia political lines or something. Just sayin'.

    What irritates you most on the internet? ADS. Constant ads everywhere.

    What brand is your digital camera? Wouldn't Nikon be an awesome name for a chicken? But I think the next batch is getting themed with Ghostbusters, so that'll have to wait. When I was in high school we had twin goats named Timex and Speidel.

    Do you watch movies with your parents? I don't watch movies with anyone except Scott, and he's about burned out. I can take any movie in the world an turn it into an MST3K fest, I can't help it. Before Mike Nelson came along, I had no idea anyone else ever did stuff like that. The new Star Trek movie in 2009 got several lengthy posts here (which I've since quietly put away into a drawer), and *still* I ask- if all it takes is one little drop of red matter to implode a planet into a black hole, why, oh why did Spock have so much of it in the first place... Can you say o-m-g in Vulcan? ILLOGICAL. Where is Sheldon Cooper on this? Why have I not heard him complaining?

    What song best describes your life right now? INVINCIBLE.


    Do you own expensive perfume/cologne? My fave has been discontinued. I weep. I would love to try Lady Gaga's new Fame, but since I'm already having to avoid everything with citrus and nuts at the top of a growing list, I can't imagine thinking I can get away with a spritz of belladonna and apricot. Oral Allergy Syndrome I had to abandon sitting in church a long time ago, thanx to the cacophony of colognes and hair products all around me. Now, if someone were to come out with a benadryl-esque fragrance, THAT I would try.

    Are you taking college classes right now? I am never *not* doing mega research and studying.

    Do you like sushi? I've never tried it, but if I ever do I'll have to do vegetarian sushi because I've recently come up with shellfish and seafood allergic reactions, too. I know, life sux sometimes. I'm currently waiting on a company to get back with me on a list of ingredients in their kosher vegetarian vitamins. There's just about nothing else I can take, so I'm crossing my fingers that their "vegetable" ingredients don't include legumes (seriously, my peanut allergy seems to have jumped the shark, arg!), mango (related to cashews, which make me anaphylactic), or any citrus at all. They already claim to be free of milk, egg, fish, shellfish, tree nuts, peanuts, and wheat. It's like the old chicken feed we used to get, broke my arms out and had me itching like mad, and we found out that 'ground vegetable protein' was very possible entire peanut plants, so now even my chicken feed has to list every ingredient. So yeah, I wanna know what the heck is in my vitamins, and definitely my sushi.

    Do you get your hair cut every month? Lately I've been in a rut where I get it mowed super short and then let it grow out and then get it mowed again about a year later or something, but I'm thinking I'm getting about tired of having teeny weeny hair, even if I can be out in the wind and still look great without hair products (which break me out). I think at it's longest, my hair made it to 3 feet long one year. I might try for something like that again.

    Do you go online everyday? I cut that out over the last year. I know, I know, severe withdrawal after obliterating twitter and destroying facebook and all that, but I seriously needed a break. I can go all week now without checking my email and it doesn't bother me at all. I think it's important to realize that the people online aren't as immediately important as the people around us in our lives. Besides, it all pales in comparison when bigger things happen. You can't get back what you miss, you know? So don't miss it.

    Will you pass this survey on to 5 people? Nah, just email it to yourselves so you can fill it out, too.


  • summer survey 2012


    1) Do you comb or brush your hair?
    I'm lately into Colin Morgan worship. My hair is living a life of its own and isn't answering my emails.

    2) Are you allergic to anything strange?
    Gadolinium contrast, among a lengthy list. I'm an allergy bracelet fashionista. Note- limonene is in everything from candles to makeup to insect repellent to cleaners... That is concentrated citrus oils. I really miss lemon pie. Oh, yeah, and polymorphous light eruption. I have allergic reactions to sunlight. I guess I should mention that I'm allergic to Colin Morgan, as well, since he is into peanut butter.

    3) What’s your dream vacation?
    Nebulae tours in a star cruiser, visiting the upper wealthier crust of Coruscant, stuff like that.

    4) Have you discovered anything because of fandom?
    I have the most severe social anxiety of anyone I know.

    5) What’s your favorite domestic thing to do?
    I can reinvent nearly any recipe, thanx to that allergy list up there. I've been told I have ruined people on restaurant food, they'd rather eat here.

    6) Do you remember the pairing that got you into fandom?

    7) What’s the oddest compliment you’ve ever received?
    I apparently have perfect eyebrows. Being peered at closely just offset from actual eye contact is a little bit unnerving.

    8) What are your favorite non-fandom websites to visit?
    My own. I know, I severely lack links. I did that on purpose.

    9) What’s your favorite scent/perfume to wear - candle to burn?
    Clove, nearly impossible to find.

    10) Coffee/tea - black, with milk, sugar?
    I blend my own, and it's awesome, only 1/2 cup a day. Prolly the most expensive habit I have nowadays besides collecting rare chicken breeds. I'm lately into laced wyandottes, and I have a blue egger that looks like a freak cross between a hawk (front) and a pidgeon (body). Yeah, I know, this was a question about coffee, like you care.

    11) Are you looking forward to summer?
    This is the snakiest, spideriest, tickiest summer we've ever had, between already being checked in ER for raging tick fever, running into a wolf spider in my kitchen (1 of 3 so far), and several ginormous 4-6 foot snakes in the back yard. Looking forward to ice storms next winter, usually don't root for those.

 photo surveybuttonsm.jpg

I've started transferring my survey posts over to Surveypalooza so people coming in from search engines on mobile devices will be able to see the surveys.


Apologies for the missing vids, another upgrade during the server migration swept through like a scan sweeping through the Enterprise. I'll fix those later, kinda busy...

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